Posted by: Nancy Brown | September 21, 2006

The eve of my motherhood….

One year ago I was laying in a hospital bed being told that I was going to have to deliver my son. I was told not to yell, scream, cry, or even throw up. It was to early……

September 20th 2005 : I had been feeling crappy all day. There was something not right. I called my doctor and the nurse told me to take it easy and not do anything. I stayed on the couch watching TV and doing homework. Dallas came home early from work and he had to go to a job interview that night .I decided to go to work. I was sitting at work so no big deal. He was going to drop me off and when my shift was over he would come and get me. Big Brother season finale was on and we were gonna watch it together. I got off work and he wasn’t there yet.  I called him and he was on his way so I decided to walk and meet him. BIG mistake. I started to cramp that evening but the Nurse earlier said that if there were less than four in an hour then it wasn’t a big deal. So I was up and down to the bathroom. I couldn’t go but I really had to. I decided to eat something. It all came back up. I keep getting sicker and sicker. We decided that I had a bladder infection and that we needed to go to the ER. We decided to go to Alta View so that Dallas and his Dad could give me a blessing. ( they live close by Alta View) Dallas went into the ER and told them taht I was sick and outside so if they could help me. They took me into the Labor and delivery part of the hospital. I had the most wonderful nurse. Her name was Windy.  She had me pee in a cup and put on a monitor. The monitor didn’t pick up anything including a heart beat. They had to get the doppler out just to find a heart beat.  They figured I had a bladder infection but it was more than that. I was having a baby!! They tipped my bed upside down and started me on Magnesium to stop the labor and gave me shots of steroids to help Tylers lungs. There was nothing they could do he was coming.

15 week to soon!! It was to early. I knew deep in my heart that it was to early. If he came now he would not make it. I would go home empty handed with a broken heart. They called maternal life flight to come and get me. They got there and I was to dialated to take on the helicopter. It took them 2 freaking hours to decide. I could have made it somewhere else by then. So then they  called pediatric life flight to take my extremely tiny infant. They decided to do a c-section at that point and do it without being in an emergency situation. My water had not broken yet. His feet were hanging out. The nurse put in my catheder and my water broke. It became an emergency situation.

As I was wheeled into the OR I had to leave the love of my life behind with no idea how or what the future held for our son. We loved him so much but had never met him. He was to soon!!! As I moved onto the operating table from my bed I had another contraction. Up till this point I had no pain medication. The anesthiologist decided that I had had enough and didn’t even wait to start putting me under. The last thing I remember was them draping my belly.

Waking up I immediately asked for Dallas and they let him in and he told me that they were working on him and that he had seen him and that he was alive. Dallas had been watching them do CPR on our little son. I then went back to sleep. On the way back to my room I remember being wheeled past my parents and everyone telling me that he was beautiful. They were going to let me see him before they took him to LDS or PCMC. They wheeled him into my room. I couldn’t really see him because I had to take my contacts out to have surgery. But Dallas gave him a blessing and I KNEW that we would be okay. That our family would be started that day.

Tyler Kenneth Brown was born at 1:24 AM on September 21st 2005. He weighed 1 lb 11oz. He was 13 inches long. He was life flighted by helicopter to LDS hospital where he would stay for 30 days. He would have one surgery, and suffer from grade 3 and 4 brain bleeds. He was transferred to have a reservoir placed for Hydrocephalus. He would stay at PCMC for 63 days. He would endure 2 more surgeries and many ups and downs. He came home one day before his due date…. December 23, 2005.

He is my first born. He is my life. He made me a mom! He made us a family. He is the joy of our lives. He was born 15 weeks to soon! He was perfect. He was mine.  He was OURS!

Tys birth picture

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Responses

  1. Nancy, I really just want to say thank you, for this site, for your honesty and for taking the time. As cathartic as I can only imagine doing this might be for you, it is priceless to others. My sister became a mom to our Lily on last Friday the 13th (proof God has a sense of humor). She is 2.01 lbs. and struggling. I am in constant search for help, for faith for anything I might be able to DO. Your info was some of the only that felt “real” and struck a chord. Although I know we face a rollercoaster to hell and back and that no two experiences in the world of preemies are the same, I also know that any comfort is good comfort. Thank you again, God bless, Melissa


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