Posted by: Nancy Brown | March 24, 2007

The things that we have to learn

The last few days have gotten me in a reflective mood. It has gotten me to wonder why some things happen to some people and not to others.  It has gotten me thinking that other people have a lot of trials while others just complain and have NO freaking idea.

A friend of mine had a late term loss today. She was 18 weeks pregnant. She was going to be having a beautiful princess. Instead she went home empty. I think this person is so strong. She is a wonderful lady who has known a lot of tragedy. Yet in the tradgedies she is living she LOVES her family. Her little boy is amazing and he gives the best high fives. She has taken in her sisters kids, lost her own children, lost the NORMAL she wanted with her 3 year old and now this. She doesn’t deserve it. Yet she is strong. She was concerned about me and my life. She is so wonderful . I wanted to tell her that I am so thankful she came into my life at the time she did. I needed the strength to get through it all. I hope that I can do that for her now.

It got me thinking of the times when I think I want another child. I don’t want one for the right reasons. I want one because I dont’ know normal yet I couldn’t bear the thought that I might have another little one like Tyler. One that can’t be brought home from the hosptial with me. That I can’t feel kick all the time. I can’t handle that going home empty. I can’t handle the people around me constantly complaing about being pregnant. Until you walk in my shoes you have NO IDEA. That is why I love Lisa. She gets it. And yet she has had so much sadness. I love her.

I wanted to leave Lisa with a little thought. One that I am sure she has heard a million times.  The time in the Doctrine and Covenants when Joseph Smith was going through persecutions God told him that all things would be for his Good. Well frankly.. why? Its like the refiners fire. When we learn all we have to learn we are this nice well rounded person. Till then we struggle and we cry. Its ok to cry but know that it is in this time of trial we learn who we are and who we are and that we aren’t in control of our lives.

Thank you for being a good friend and a wonderful person. Thank you for being an example of strength in more than one way. Thank you. You are one of my Heroes. I hope you know that. Thank you. Thank you!  You are in my prayers tonight.

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